this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
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[–] Alexxxolotl@sh.itjust.works 31 points 5 months ago (29 children)

Hold on. Apologies for being out of the loop, but do people really bring sexual fetish stuff to a pride parade?

And if so, what does that have to do with LGBTQ+?

[–] Shapillon@lemmy.world 23 points 5 months ago (27 children)

Imho there are two angles to this question:

  • First, queer folks are more likely to be kinky. Since they had to figure out what clicks for them at least once, they tend to do it on multiple aspects of their identities.
  • Secondly - and this one is more of a personal standpoint - I'd argue that kinks fall under the wider umbrella of queerness or GRSM (Gender Relational and Sexual Minorities which I find way better than an enumeration acronym).

I'd also advocate for including neurodivergences under the queer brand too for instance.

[–] Alexxxolotl@sh.itjust.works 13 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Thanks for the answer. Although, I still don't really get it.

I've heard that the kink community has a rule that people shouldn't expose their fetishes to non-consenting strangers. Why on pride parades then? Isn't engaging in these sort of activities here kind of wrong, like how you can't just go out nude or have sex in public?

[–] tabris@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

It really depends on where you are and what sort of Pride event it is. If it's a Pride march with lots of corporate sponsors, then you'll see very little kink, maybe someone in full rubber, but probably no jockstraps. If it's a ticketed gay village party, or a circuit party, you'll definitely see some more risque kink gear being worn. If you're at Folsom or in Berlin, there's whole parades dedicated to kink, but even the straight public know about that, so if they don't like it, they can avoid the area during those events.

[–] Shapillon@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago

This is my personal opinion and it might not reflect the wider community's. I'm not even giving a straight answer, just some points to think about ^^

First and foremost Pride isn't a singular event. Some are more celebratory and family friendly. But imho it's original purpose is a protest and protests aren't subject to the same rules as other places and times. e.g. you don't tend to shout in the street everyday.

Secondly this rule as an absolute doesn't make a lot of sense. Even without critiquing the wider society's rules a choker isn't the same as a full puppy outfit. (and tbf I don't see the issue with pups, it's just dress up ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

Lastly, I personally find that view kinda rooted in puritanism. Why should it be shameful in the first place? It kinda has "don't ask don't tell" vibes.

Lastly, how do you precisely define what's a kink and what's not?

[–] chumbalumber@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 5 months ago

I recommended this to someone else in the thread too, but I found Kat Blaque's video really helpful as an explanation, because if you're not familiar with the subculture the reasoning can be quite confusing.

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