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You're doubling down on the "teaching" bit. I'm not seeing a "teaching" angle that makes any difference here. What is it that you think Vulcans taught humans than they wanted to teach Romulans?
I'm not saying that. I'm saying it could be the perspective of the Romulans. The Romulans are less driven by logic and rationale than by their emotions and passions. Meaning, they'd make this assessment overriding logic and instead embracing emotion, envy and anger in this case.
Absolutely, and humans are no exception to these conflicts. In the area of this conflict of thought process Humans, Vulcans, and Romulans are equal. There is no position that all 3 agree on 100% with each other.
The teaching angle is to emphasize the Vulkan angle since you were making arguments for the Romulan angle already. Even the "emotionless" Vulkan don't constantly reach out for the obvious logical solution because there are sociological reasons they expect no purchase. Reasons that purposefully reflect faults of humanity, and thusly are inherently illogical to some degree given the "Vulcan" prescription of excellent logic.
If you want to be charitable to the writers, it's a great way to point out how bigotry trancends logic. They might actually make headway with outreach, but they do not, because Vulkans are the know-it-all types. I sort-of stated the expected dynamic backwards, but it still works because I'm sure Romulans would still dismiss the intelligence of Vulkans for nearly the exact same reason: they think they already have it figured out.
Yes, it's illogical, but that's part of the point: Logic is not wisdom. Someone can be plenty intelligent and yet still be a fool.
It's worth not over-analyzing, though, since it is a situation set up for allegory of human folly in a TV show, not one written in to a planned book series where it might have to stand up to stronger cohesive scrutiny. All you have to do is not explain things well, and suddenly the script isn't cohesive with canon. They are written to be laughably similar species to reinforce how dumb bigotry is, so something basically HAS to make little logical sense, because bigotry is illogical.