Wow, really? Sure is an expensive and necessarily painful thing to opt into or to normalize. I'd rather it be normalized to not get married in the first place.

[–] naught@sh.itjust.works 9 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I think a divorce is like $80 where I am, but if you have to go to court obvs it's a lot more. I spent almost nothing on my wedding, granted it was just friends and was an elopement. Marriage has big tax advantages for some, and it's the only way my spouse was getting health insurance to survive this godforsaken wasteland. It also guarantees that they get a slice of my income if the unforeseeable happens and we split so they can survive.

I think people should not see marriage as the end goal, but be pragmatic about its costs and benefits, which I think you are getting at too

[–] BolexForSoup@kbin.social 2 points 9 months ago

This is just another person who doesn’t want to get married that therefore thinks nobody else should be allowed to.

[–] Bunnylux@lemmy.world 1 points 9 months ago

All good points.

[–] BolexForSoup@kbin.social 3 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

When he says normalize, he’s not saying it is something that people should seek out. In case that was somehow taken that way.

The problem is there is immense social pressure, especially against women, to never have a divorce. It is seen as a failure, whereas sometimes it is simply the result of circumstances beyond our control or is just something one person, or maybe both, need in their lives.

I am happily married. Like many people we have had our ups and downs. Every couple should do everything they can to repair their relationship and make it work. But sometimes it’s just not enough. Sometimes you weren’t supposed to be together, sometimes one person has some issue that they just will never resolve, sometimes you find out things about your partner or things emerged down the line. We are not prescient, things change. So people should feel very comfortable divorcing without all of the social baggage that comes with it. Because divorce is inevitable, it is never going to go away. And it is a viable decision for one to make.

As for marriage, you don’t have to participate and to say you just want it to go away is kind of ridiculous because we both know that is not going to happen. So we deal with reality and accept that divorce is part of the marriage landscape.

[–] Bunnylux@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's not that expensive, I did it for $400 amicably. We had a fun time while married and I don't regret it. Why not just make it easier for people to do what they want and not punish young people for making decisions.

[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 0 points 9 months ago

And yet it's costed others (every day) thousands to millions of dollars