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Is it wrong for 25M to date 19F? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by MTK@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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So I met this girl by chance and we really hit it off, once I learned of her age I decided to just be friends as I think that 19 to 25 is an age were we mature a lot and I remember myself as a 19yo and I was not mature enough to be a good partner and to be good to myself.

I talked to a female friend of mine and she said that I'm over thinking it and that I should ask her out and be open minded, and so I did and we are going on a date soon.

The thing is, she seems really mature but I can't put aside the age gap.

Am I over thinking it? Should I really just take it slow and just be vigilant about the situation and notice if this isn't healthy for me or her?

Or should I let her down easy and continue as friends?

Update: We went on a date and it was great, I read all of the comments and there were some really good advices that I took to heart. I will take things slow and try to be as aware of the situation as possible. I hope it will go well :)

Thank you everyone!

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[–] elouboub@kbin.social 37 points 1 year ago (14 children)

USAian society has probably told you there is some kind of formula to calculate whether it's alright. Fuck that. Treat her like a human, not some input to a formula. Be decent, communicate, and if she's fine with it and likes you, that's all that matters. Society shouldn't come between you and another human.

[–] Serinus@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Yeah, there's really nothing wrong with a 50 year old dating a 19 year old. Age is just a number. There's no power imbalance there or expectations. It's perfectly healthy for the 19 year old to get into a long term relationship where their partner is going to be 70 before they're 40.

Or, maybe, half your age + 7 is a good rule. It's pretty lenient.

[–] elouboub@kbin.social -3 points 1 year ago

Way to treat another human like an input to formula. Good job

Absolutely wrong

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