this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2023
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Carry ons should be put in the overhead bin or tuck under your seat.
If you carry your baby onto the plane, be kind to your fellow passengers and put it in the bin.
Okay, I'm gonna bite the bullet and say it. This is disheartening. I'm not one to clutch pearls, but come on. Would you say this about anyone else? Dogs? Cats? Anything at all? Do you understand how fucked up it is? I just don't get it. It was the same in Reddit, and it's fucking same in here. Why do you hate children? You don't wanna have them, that's fine. Why would you say these things?
Maybe you're joking. Even after assuming that you are, this is in poor taste and a fucked up thing to say.
You can train dogs and cats to be quiet and sit still. Not all of them will be happy doing it for a long plane ride, but you can do it. Babies on the other hand? Babies don't give a fuck.
Hungry?
Scream.
Tired?
Scream.
Happy?
Scream.
Mad?
Scream
You can do everything right and the baby will still scream.
See, I have this speculation that early humans were fucking dumb, had no object permanence, couldn't keep track of their kids, and generally pretended they didn't exist unless they were being annoying. So their babies had to fucking scream as loud as a firetruck for their parents to not lose them.
That's the other thing too. The sound of a crying baby will drive anyone who doesn't have antisocial personality disorder or has been driven deaf by the wonders of childcare completely insane. Why? Because while the sheer volume of a baby's scream might not be as loud as a barking dog on an objective decibel scale, but when it comes to perceptual decibel levels, babies are loud. Our hearing sensitivity varies based on pitch. The higher the pitch, the more sensitive our ears are. On top of that, our brains are hardwired to have a reaction to a screaming baby, which can manifest itself as irritation, annoyance, frustration, and other negative emotions, because our primitive monkey brains are screeching, "WHY WON'T YOU TAKE CARE OF BABY!?" but we can't do anything because it's not our baby.
That's why people like to make jokes about dead babies, infant abuse, etc. Because babies are annoying as hell and literally everything they do is designed to make sure we know they're there at all times.
Edit: AND ONE MORE THING, have you ever wondered how a parent can love their baby when it's quiet but hate it when it's awake? Yeah, that's almost certainly a result of primitive humans trying to take advantage of the fact that the annoying poop demon was finally quiet and wasn't ear-fucking their monkey brain into guilt-tripping them anymore, so that they could ditch their babies when they were sleeping. So you can probably thank the negligent, sociopathic protohumans for babies being annoying as shit.
Babies evolved to cry all the time because their parents had this habit of making the species that just looked at the baby in a weird way go extinct.