this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2024
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AuDHD here. I got put on Buspar for anxiety once. It worked amazingly well at getting rid of anxiety. Unfortunately, I learned that anxiety was the only way I accomplished anything meaningful. I would have to be anxious that I would disappoint someone or something would result in terrible outcomes if I didn't do it. When the Buspar got rid of anxiety, I lost my drive to accomplish anything. I remember telling the doc, "I don't feel like doing anything. I just sit there." So, I was taken off of it.
My personal psychological intervention for ADHD was military training instilling discipline and increasing anxiety to illicit the military discipline to avoid doom. In other words, I accomplished everything meaningful by pretending I was in war. Accomplishments weren't accomplishments to celebrate. They were avoidance of harm to feel relieved by. A life full of fear rather than pleasure and pride.
omg I can't believe I just figured that out rn lol ๐
We are fighting a war. Try not doing the things that stress you out. Straight to living in a van down by a river.
But man, what a carefree couple months it gets you. Like mana from the sky, a blissful oasis in a sea of hurt, never to return.