this post was submitted on 26 Jun 2023
115 points (98.3% liked)

Don’t You Know Who I Am?

3818 readers
1 users here now

Posts of people not realising the person they’re talking to, is the person they’re talking about.

Acceptable examples include:

Discussions on any topic are encouraged but arguements are not welcome in this community. Participate in good faith - don’t be aggressive and don’t argue for arguments sake.

The posts here are not original content, the poster is not OP and doesn’t necessarily agree with or condone the views in the post. The poster is not looking to argue with you about the content in the post.

Rules:

This community follows the rules of the lemmy.world instance and the lemmy.org code of conduct. I’ve summarised them here:

  1. Be civil, remember the human.
  2. No insulting or harassing other members. That includes name calling.
  3. Censor any identifying info of private individuals in the posts. This includes surnames and social media handles.
  4. Respect differences of opinion. Civil discussion/debate is fine, arguing is not. Criticise ideas, not people.
  5. Keep unrequested/unstructured critique to a minimum. If you wish to discuss how this community is run please comment on the stickied post so all meta conversations are in one place.
  6. Remember we have all chosen to be here voluntarily. Respect the spent time and effort people have spent creating posts in order to share something they find amusing with you.
  7. Swearing in general is fine, swearing to insult another commenter isn’t.
  8. No racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia or any other type of bigotry.
  9. No incitement of violence or promotion of violent ideologies.

Please report comments that break site or community rules to the mods. If you break the rules you’ll receive one warning before being banned from this community.

PLEASE READ LEMMY.ORG’S CITIZEN CODE OF CONDUCT: https://join-lemmy.org/docs/code_of_conduct.html

PLEASE READ LEMMY.WORLD’S CODE OF CONDUCT: https://lemmy.world/legal

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] _finger_@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago (3 children)

We used to call these people patronizing but it got gendered for some reason

[–] asdfasdfasdf@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

It's funny because "patron" in "patronize" comes from "pater" which means father.

[–] heili@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

And "condescending" is also available to describe this behavior.

[–] PopularUsername@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Yeah in my books, "Mansplaining" has never had proper meaning. It was just a way of blaming men for a particular behaviour, which is generally neutral to begin with.

[–] kbotc@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Nah, it came from a very real workspace behavior where men would explain things to women when the woman would be the expert.

It’s very well studied: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/it-s-man-s-and-woman-s-world/201603/the-psychology-mansplaining

[–] PopularUsername@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Is an interesting topic of discussion, unfortunately, they always seem to attach these things to a specific gender or race and it makes the whole thing sound childish. It's like the concept of micro-aggressions, I like the idea of investigating the subtleties of human behaviour which can have covert but large effects, but they immediately attach it to race and racism.

[–] _finger_@lemmy.world -2 points 1 year ago

The people who came up with it just didn’t have a lot of real world experience dealing with people. Most likely college kids writing from their own, narrow minded viewpoint (with a dash of narcissism)

[–] Zyrxil@lemmy.world -1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Because it's a specific subset of patronizing, where it wouldn't have happened if the target were not a woman.

[–] Lightor@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

What about the other way around, what's that called? Like I've had women "mansplain" cooking to me because I am a guy.

[–] Zyrxil@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Womansplaining I guess? It's not a popular phrase or even one I've ever heard anyone else use, but it somewhat fits as she explained it because she felt like you don't understand cooking as a guy. But it's missing the other context where mansplaining only became a popular term because lots of women could identify with their own personal experiences of being condescendingly explained to just because they're a woman.