this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] 0x4E4F@lemmy.fmhy.ml 34 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

So true 😞...

And then she comes back and says "yeah, we're out" and you're like "yessssss, see that b*tch, I knew it!".

[–] ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca 16 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Did you really say bitch though?

[–] srwax@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

I looked her in the windows of her soul and I said biiiiiiisssshhhhhh

[–] Screwthehole@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I did I said... shoulder check.... biiitch

[–] yopyop@feddit.de 8 points 1 year ago

I said I said... biiiiiitch

[–] 0x4E4F@lemmy.fmhy.ml 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Of course not, lol, that whole paragraph is silently going on in my head πŸ˜‚.

To be perfectly honest, my wife scares the shit out of me, she's like 300 lbs, you don't want to mess with that πŸ˜‚.

[–] Screwthehole@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] 0x4E4F@lemmy.fmhy.ml 5 points 1 year ago

Man, I miss hanging out with people who hate their wives...

And yeah, I needed that πŸ˜‚.

[–] Kokanee08@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

For me it's a 50/50 chance that either it was right in front of my face exactly where I was looking, or we're actually out of it. No in between

[–] 0x4E4F@lemmy.fmhy.ml 3 points 1 year ago

Exactly the same.

[–] srwax@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You said that? You said "bitch"?

[–] 0x4E4F@lemmy.fmhy.ml 5 points 1 year ago

No, just thought of it loudly in my head πŸ˜‚.

[–] thorbot@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If you call your wife a bitch, you’re doing it wrong

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago

"And I said, biiiiiitch ..."

[–] 0x4E4F@lemmy.fmhy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

That whole part is silent, of course 😁. Dare say that in front of her and you better run πŸ˜‚.

[–] Obsession@sh.itjust.works 31 points 1 year ago

I realized that when I look for something, I have a precise mental image of what I'm looking for. If the real object doesn't match my mental image, it may as well not exist.

Case in point, my girlfriend asked me to get her allergy meds. I was looking for a box with blister packs, they were in a bottle. I literally moved the bottle aside while looking, before telling her that I can't find them

[–] thorbot@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

I just go straight to the step where I ask her and she gets frustrated because it’s right in front of my stupid face

[–] TrontheTechie@infosec.pub 11 points 1 year ago

This is even more fun in a professional kitchen.

β€œBro, we had three people look and be unable to find it, add it to the 86 list.”

β€œI just saw some in the walk in” Goes to look

[–] DeweyOxberger@kbin.social 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Like many people, I suffer from Refrigerator Blindness. My wife, however, does not. I learned to never assume we are out of something. I always assume I just can't see it.

[–] AllonzeeLV@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

As a married man, I just prefer to eat out and have hidden stores in high places of the house.

[–] henfredemars@lemdro.id 7 points 1 year ago

"Did you move things?!"

[–] AllonzeeLV@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Tell her to make you a sandwich while she's checking, if she asks why tell her it'll calm her down and stop her from getting emotional.

[–] Num10ck@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] happyhippo@feddit.it 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Ultimate survival tip is here πŸ‘†πŸ»

[–] FartsWithAnAccent@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] SJ_Zero@lemmy.fbxl.net 3 points 1 year ago
[–] happyhippo@feddit.it 3 points 1 year ago
[–] Tenthrow@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

My problem is, I'm often convinced we are NOT out of something when we are. Can be more painful when cooking.

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