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Run my own instance. @Candelestine@lemmy.world is right but there are more details. Federation is not a "sync." When your instance needs to fetch from another instance it will, but it does not get history. You can get a specific comment or post from any time however.
This is not by default either. Only communities that your users subscribe to will be updated by their "origin" instances.
This does happen, but it also stores what your users do on remote instances as well as "copies" of what they interact with. Images (currently the only media hosted by lemmy servers) are linked to thier "origin" as well. So you are storing text of posts and comments.
So let’s say I’m on lemm.ee and I decide that I want to see “All.” Does that mean I’m only seeing what other users on lemm.ee are subscribed to?
That is exactly what that means and it's frustrating to say the least, because it's not clear that's what's happening.
Would you say it makes sense to have accounts on the 2-3 instances that you're most interested in rather than 2 account and being dependent on federation?
There's no general answer, it depends on your personal preference.
If you want to have most content available, register on an instance which has an according policy; which federates with anybody and is federated by everybody (both directions can make a difference).
The downside however is, this also opens the door to all sorts of bad actors, including bots and spam.
So I personally tried to strike a balance and am so far quite happy on lemm.ee.
This tool is pretty handy to make informed decisions: https://fba.ryona.agency/ It allows you to check federation status both ways.
Thanks for that link. Really interesting.