Sadly, this is not the Onion.

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For true stories that you could have sworn were from The Onion.

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101
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Pastor claims to be able to talk to God on his cellphone (observers.france24.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/neptunian-rings on 2024-05-25 22:30:03.
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Pronouns and tribal affiliations are now forbidden in South Dakota public university employee emails (apnews.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Gayfetus on 2024-05-25 19:00:17.
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Head of Corporate Social Responsibility among WWE cuts (www.postwrestling.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/McGuire72 on 2024-05-25 17:36:26.
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Bear meat kebabs at a family reunion lead to rare outbreak of roundworm disease (www.nbcnews.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/GlobalTravelR on 2024-05-25 17:17:05.
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Nicki Minaj Arrested In Amsterdam For Alleged Drug Possession (allhiphop.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/PatriotNews_dot_com on 2024-05-25 16:59:40.
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Man says he ordered burger with everything removed, received empty box and gave big tip (komonews.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Forward-Answer-4407 on 2024-05-25 16:19:47.
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Austin's hippie culture thrives as a top naked gardening city (www.mysanantonio.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Hectabeni on 2024-05-25 14:34:17.
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Pope clears way for first millennial saint, dubbed ‘God’s Influencer’ (iowa.forums.rivals.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/skotfree on 2024-05-25 13:12:32.
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What classic TV houses cost in today’s housing market. Hint you probably can’t afford any of them (country1025.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Acceptable_Hurry_132 on 2024-05-24 23:15:50.

Well I guess the Shameless house but…

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Family stricken with rare brain worms after eating undercooked bear (arstechnica.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/No_Cockroach_4302 on 2024-05-25 05:36:22.
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Gov. Newsom's 1,200 tiny homes for California homeless remain vacant (www.abc10.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/DCC_4LIFE on 2024-05-25 03:42:41.
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California to legalize human composting by 2027 as residents seek environmentally healthy burials (headtopics.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/kockin26 on 2024-05-25 01:51:54.
113
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Sheriff: Alabama woman arrested for stealing flowers from graves (www.wdef.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Sandstorm400 on 2024-05-25 01:35:05.
114
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Great Job, Internet: Google’s AI feeds people answers from The Onion (www.avclub.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/The_Ethics_Officer on 2024-05-25 00:48:15.
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UFC fighter says he’ll homeschool son so he doesn’t ‘end up turning gay’ (inshort.geartape.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/gootyy on 2024-05-25 00:07:29.
116
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Hiker mauled by grizzly in Grand Teton National Park played dead, officials say; bear won't be pursued (www.cbsnews.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/EverSoInfinite on 2024-05-24 23:59:28.
117
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Mexican cartels taking control of tortilla industry (www.newsnationnow.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/millitzer on 2024-05-24 16:30:47.
118
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Louisiana governor signs bill making abortion drugs controlled dangerous substances (apnews.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/engadine_maccas1997 on 2024-05-24 22:18:32.
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‘Fallout’ Producer Jonathan Nolan Wonders ‘Where Are All the Original Stories?’ Amid Rise of TV Adaptations (variety.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/King-Owl-House on 2024-05-24 21:56:41.
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2 WA men accused of selling fake Pokémon, sports cards in $2M scheme (www.fox29.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/indig0sixalpha on 2024-05-24 21:49:19.
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Blind and deaf dog Teddy got lost in a neighbor’s yard. Police called to help him shot him dead (www.inkl.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/indig0sixalpha on 2024-05-24 21:40:13.
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NFL sold out of Harrison Butker women’s jerseys following Benedictine graduation speech (www.kctv5.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/DCC_4LIFE on 2024-05-24 20:26:30.
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Man arrested for drunkenly teaching teen to drive, dances in street (abcnews4.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Sctvman on 2024-05-24 19:32:14.
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ABBA goes to court to demand its right to throw eggs (timesofmalta.com)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/epiclevellama on 2024-05-24 18:11:17.
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Glue pizza and eat rocks: Google AI search errors go viral (www.bbc.co.uk)
submitted 5 months ago by bOt@zerobytes.monster to c/nottheonion@zerobytes.monster
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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/tyw7 on 2024-05-24 17:55:28.
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