MicrondeMMMMMMM

That's the correct answer, just gaslight everyone into thinking you were always a girl they just didn't pay attention!

never hated women but yes XD

Entered late egg stage at 15 I kinda knew then, I repressed from 17 to 18+1/2, after that I started exploring my gender again (stuff like shaving leg, epilating, etc...) and eventually realised I wasn't living for myself but for others when I was 19 (2-3 months away from turning 20) and decided then and there that I would transition, I came out to my parents a month after and tried to get HRT immediately, at the same time I changed my pronouns and my name with them as well, it took me nearly five months to be able to start the treatment (had to store my sperm). I was 20 and now I'm 7months on HRT :)

I understand not feeling valid enough for HRT the best way I can put it is: put aside the validity of your trans identity, do you want all the effects of HRT despite the "downsides"? you don't have to be trans to get HRT.

I've progressively come to the realisation that I do indeed want GRS, I always wanted FFS and GRS felt less important, but as time goes on I realise that, I'm never going to have a fullfilling sex life with my current equipment...

I haven't had FFS or GRS yet, but I've been on hormones for a while.

before HRT I was pretty depressed, the culprit was the fact that no matter what I did my body got worse (more masculine). For example: I hated shaving because I had to, I was horrified that shaving might make my beard grow faster (it doesn't but it does make it more visible), so for years I would pluck it out in the hopes that it would slow down and stop spreading but it kept creeping up to other areas of my face. I couldn't do anything .

That wasn't the only thing, my face, my hairline, my body, my voice, everything was always getting worse.

At one point it genuinely got really bad and I decided that I would stop living as others expected me to, that day I started transitioning, I came out to my parents about two months later and 3.5 months after that I started HRT.

Starting HRT is really magical the first day you're super excited but nothing really happens for like 48h, then if the treatment is correct (correct dosage) you start to feel pretty tired for a week or two, this is because testosterone kinda acts like caffeine in a way and gives you a lot of energy, you get used to it fast though and then the changes start coming in. More importantly though, you know for sure at that point that things aren't getting any worse and that probably is the most HRT will do for your mental health.

Mentally the first month was a roller-coaster going from "Yipee i got HRT!!! 🎉" to "is this thing even working?☹️" (it is working it's just slow, manage your expectations!), estradiol kicks in and suddenly you feel things it's strange but stuff feels more vibrant, music(for me) became insanely good one day and I've been listening to so much music since, it's crazy. That could 100% be because I was less depressed but I have a feeling it's not only that.

Then the physical changes start, you actually don't notice them, but I just took pictures every month an yeah things are definitely changing so that feels really good! It does feel unreal, like I have boobs now that's the coolest shit ever!!! you get used to your body but things like hips and breasts still amaze me when I see them.

I'm not fully where I want to be but I actually kinda like my body and I would have told you that was impossible a few years back.

Yeah, call me old fashioned XD Thanks for your replies :)

My country has a small queer community and an even smaller portion of ppl who are tech savvy enough to use mastodon. And an even tinier portion might live in my region.

I should maybe make a post to see how it goes but tbh I'm not getting my hopes up...

There might not be big enough of a community though :(

I probably should yeah 👍

Pacman -Syyu when you're feeling extra desperate XD

:P I'm good, if things go south I can count on you?