this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2023
77 points (92.3% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26980 readers
1849 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Then_I_said@lemmy.sdf.org 8 points 1 year ago

Strive for independence with every fiber of your being. Your family that you live with doesn't love you.

That's why they're dicks to you. They lie and tell you it's "for your own good" or some other bullshit. But really they're afraid to admit that they don't know how to love you... They may not know how to love anyone.

Being grounded for 2/3 of the year every year - when you have no disciplinary or legal troubles - is imprisonment, it is not just punishment. Making you eat vomit is not an important life lesson, it is abuse. A person who openly favors one child over the other doesn't love any of her children, least of all you.

Your brothers learned to love from someone incapable of loving. That's why they are indifferent to your suffering. That's why they only care what you can do for them and feel no obligation to do anything that benefits you.

You can't snap your fingers and be independent. But it is within your grasp if you reach for it. Reach for it with your entire being.

Your dad is reaching out now because you're 18 and he doesn't have to deal with a psycho to get ahold of you anymore. Hold him accountable, but trust his intentions. He's rusty at relating, but let him show you how much he loves you. And use that to remind you of how much the others don't.